Much like my “4th DOWN REPORT” for college ball, “THE FORWARD LATERAL” will be the weekly NFL review here in THE CHEAP SEATS. However, this will be much different. Each week in this column I will both throw myself under the bus (and no not Bettis, pause) and celebrate my foresight. By that I mean I will review every NFL game from the past week and show where I predicted the right pick and where I failed.
And give you all the equal chance to roast me, or bask in my self-appreciation and foresight. Good deal, right?
As my more consistent readers have seen, I did an 8-part NFL preview where I made the leap of faith and picked every game for all 32 teams this season. I’ll be basing my weekly parade/tomato throwing session on those picks. At the end we’ll look at the totals and open up the floor for all comers. So allow my genius, ignorance or middle ground be revealed. No matter what happens, there’s always a bright side:
At least I’ll still be better than Matt Millen.
Saints 14, Vikings 9: My Pick-Saints
The Vikings looked unsettled on offense, but gave the Saints everything they could handle on defense. Still Brees found a way to hook up with Devery Henderson for a late score.
Cardinals 17, Rams 13: My Pick-Cardinals
In a back and forth low scoring affair, new Cardinals QB Derek Anderson hooked up with Larry Fitzgerald late to get a tough win against a slightly surprising Rams team.
Seahawks 31, 49ers 6: My Pick-49ers
The Seahawks took advantage of a sloppy San Fran offense, and exposed the weaknesses in their secondary in a blow out of the 49ers.
Dolphins 15, Bills 10: My Pick-Dolphins
Another low scoring affair that plodded along with a total of 3 field goals and a safety, but to Dolphins held on and Ronnie Brown’s touchdown run held up and made the difference.
Bears 19, Lions 14:Â My Pick-Bears
Many of the same issues hindered the Bears all last year still remain as their offense was inconsistent, but a missed call on Calvin Johnson’s late catch seeming TD catch saved the day for them. Win
Titans 38, Raiders 13:Â My Pick-Titans
The improvements in Oakland’s defense apparently meant little to Chris Johnson and Vince Young, whom made several huge plays each. The Oakland offense? Well, same old same old there.
With 142 yards and 2 TD on Sunday, Johnson picked up right where he left off at in '09.
Patriots 38, Bengals 24:Â My Pick-Bengals
The Patriots took off and never looked back and clearly had the answer for a Cincinnati secondary that looked shell-shocked for much of this game. The Bengal offense woke up big time in the second half, but can’t wait to turn it on.
Ochocinco (12 catches, 159 yards) showed up, but the Cincy D obviously didn't get memo.
Giants 31, Panthers 18:Â My Pick-Giants
The Giants air attack was in full bloom and Matt Moore’s terrible play for the Panthers kept them down. Kicker John Kasay was the best option for the punch less Panthers.
Steelers 15, Falcons 9:Â My Pick-Steelers
This worked out exactly how I saw it. The reborn Steelers defense kept the Falcons out the end zone, while their incomplete offense struggled to find a way to get the job done until Rashard Mendenhall broke out finally in overtime.
Buccaneers 17, Browns 14: My Pick-Browns
In a toss-up between two clubs that won’t do too much this year, the Bucs pulled it out due to a surprising game from Josh Freeman and took advantage of a still bad Browns D.
Jaguars 24, Broncos 17:Â My Pick-Jaguars
The Jaguars surprisingly flipped the script and threw at the Broncos for the win, with David Garrard making 3 scoring passes. Even more surprisingly, they did it with Mike Sims-Walker being held to zero catches by Champ Bailey.
Texans 34, Colts 24:Â My Pick-Colts
It wasn’t that the Texans beat the Colts, it’s how they did it. They forced them to play from behind the whole game and, surprisingly, did it with their running game (231 yards from Arian Foster) over the prolific passing attack they are known for.
Foster ran over, at and around the Colts on the way to 231 yards & fast start in Houston.
Packers 27, Eagles 20:Â My Pick-Packers
The start of the Kolb era got sidelined after a concussion to the QB and made way for Michael Vick to lead the way. He almost pulled it off, but Aaron Rodgers had the Pack up by enough to hold off Vick’s late assault.
Redskins 13, Cowboys 7: My Pick-Cowboys
The preseason woes of the Cowboys offense may be more rule than exception, and they met a Redskins team ready to match them. A late (and blatant) hold reversed a Tony Romo game winning TD pass and the Skins pulled the upset.
Ravens 10, Jets 9: My Pick-Jets
This game treaded the line between defensive masterpiece and brutally ugly for both sides. The Ravens pulled it out by forcing Mark Sanchez to make plays, which he showed again he hasn’t developed the ability to do.
Chiefs 21, Chargers 14: My Pick-Chargers
The Chargers never found consistency against an energized Chiefs defense, and a few big plays from KC were enough to put them over the Chargers, despite a bad showing from the base offense.
Dexter McCluster made a debut worthy of prime time, with a 94 yard punt return in his NFL intro.
CHEAP SEATS FINAL SCORE for Week 1: 9-7
Some surprises, some close games swinging another way. However the majority is in my favor still so BREAK OUT THE CHAMPAGNE AND TOAST TO ME! (And by that I mean Miller High Life….the honorable Champagne of Beers)
Who did you have? Where’d I go obviously wrong? All Monday and Tuesday QB’s are welcomed here. Theres’s a seat waiting for you. And as always come back by to watch the games with me through the new live feed from TWITTER on the homepage and follow me at @CheapSeatFan today!
Cheap.Seats.Please. 
Great post bud, I really enjoyed reading it. Opening week of the NFL was of course a really great weekend that gave us lots of surprises. The one thing that wasn’t much of a surprise to me though was the Raiders. I really don’t think that Jason Campbell has the makings of a quarterback that can lead his team anywhere. The Raiders were dominated by the Titans on both sides of the ball and I think the only thing that is going to get significantly better for the Raiders is their defense not their offense. Also, you think you could check out my blog cuz I really wanna hear your thoughts on my thoughts. http://chrisross91.wordpress.com/2010/09/14/jason-campbell-is-not-the-answer/
I dont blame your pick on the Chiefs/Chargers game. We didnt look good @ all in the preseason and quite frankly our offense didnt look that good except for a homerun play by Charles. I did have a feeling we could if and only if, the Chiefs crowd showed up & boy did they ever! Now we face Cleveland, who last year Harrison put up something like 300 yards rushing on us, so hopefully my main man Romeo Crennel wants some revenge against his former squad. Especially w/ the prospect that Jake TheHommie might not play. We got a good schedule so hopefully we take advantage on these winnable games.
Thanks fellas. The true upsets like the Chiefs and Seahawks wins I couldn’t do anything about. I couldn’t have called those from a mile away. However, a few that I hedged on, like the Texans and Ravens, were a bit of a surprise to me. While I’m not gonna rate Mark Sanchez as a complete failure for failing to overwhelm the Ravens defense, he still looking alarmingly bad for most of it. As for the Texans, they took advantage of everything I thought was a red flag for the Colts. The run defense and offensive line. Peyton was getting killed most of that game and 31 other quarterbacks in the league right now, couldn’t have stood up and did what he did still. That may have been an extreme example, but the Colts are gonna play better D’s this year and this could be a looooooong year if they don’t fix those problems right now.
Oh yeah & while Ochocinco showed up, he disappointed by not attempting to shoot one of the Patriots’ Minutemen guns! He promised!!!
Ditto, that was all I was hoping for outta that one. Well, that and a big day from Tom Brady, but the Rated R Superstars are pro TB all season for those.